Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara

Directed by: Zoya Akhtar

Starring: Hrithik Roshan, Farhan Akhtar, Abhay Deol, Katrina Kaif, Kalki Koechlin

Released: 2011

Even among the not that impressive pieces Bollywood managed to churn out this year (which I overally rate as very poor) it is possible to find several pearls and Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara is definitely one of them. It was largely compared to Dil Chahta Hai, but even though it will probably not gain such a cult status, it has made a great impact on the audience and I even dare say it is in many aspects better. One of the greatest plus points for me was a truly equal importance of the three main characters and that they had an equal amount of screentime (whil in DCH it was mostly Aamir with two other heroes criminally sidelined, but more about that in DCH review which is eventually coming as well...).

The story starts with one rather awkward misunderstading. Kabir (Abhay) shows his girlfriend Natasha (Kalki) a ring he bought, which immediately leads her to accept what she considers a marriage proposal – only to find out seconds later he had bought the ring for his mother. However not wanting to embarrass himself or Natasha in public (because it kinda all happened on a birthday party) he actually does propose. And as soon as excited Natasha starts planning her perfect wedding, Kabir is going for a three-week long bachelor trip through Spain with his old friends Imraan (Farhan) and Arjun (Hrithik), as they had promised to each other years ago. The catch of the trip is that each of them is supposed to secretly choose an adventure sport and all three have to go through it no matter what (MEN! Or maybe more like.... BWOYS!).

Bwoys chale Spain.

However old rishtas are not as perfect as they used to be – especially the bond between Arjun and Imraan has apparently suffered. And as it turns out, none of them is going to Spain just to enjoy a trip. Arjun is trying to run away from being emotionally hurt by his ex-girlfriend getting married, Imraan is searching for his biological father and Kabir himself may not be actually be that happy about the prospect of getting married soon... All that is what probably makes them even more adamant when it comes to the adventure sports they have chosen – from scuba-diving to an annual Spanish custom of running with the bulls. All the sports can go terribly wrong. But maybe facing the death with and realizing that you don´t live twice is what the whole trip is about...

Or maybe it all is about an unforgivable waste of food.

Slow (at the verge of boring) at times, rapid at moments, even in its pace, the film is relying on the script more than anything else. Sure, the big star and glamor factor is included in the form of Hrithik and Katrina Kaif, but eventually their screentime is no longer than that of the rest of the actors (in the case of Katrina it´s actually very limited) as I have mentioned at the very beginning. It does use the gorgeous Spanish scenery, but somehow you feel it´s not about visual amazement, more like about what all that visual beauty evokes in you. And the same case is with music, which frames everything nicely. Basically everything deserves a praise from an un-fearing direction to delightufully fine performances. It was refreshing to see someone as impressive but underrated as Farhan doing such a fabulous job as Imraan, looking for his biological father without really knowing what to expect and being ultimately disappointed by what he finds (even though considering he finds the very much amazing Naseeruddin Shah it´s almost criminal to say it like that). It was fun to see Abhay Deol in a rather fun role for a change and it was definitely a treat to watch Hrithik morphing from an arrogant and self-centered businessman into an emotional human being (but not as emotional as to be called over the top or unbelievable).

Moshi moshi!

Katrina Kaif, for the first time in her life, managed not to make me fall asleep, and actually did a good job. One can always argue the role she had was not challenging (it definitely was not as it apparently reflected Katrina´s own personality a lot and did not go through any development), but she did well with whatever she was given. If there was something I did not like about her it was her lisping. I usually cannot hear her bad Hindi pronunciation (being a non-Hindi speaker myself), but she lisps even in English, most of the time her „r“ comes out as „w“. Kalki Koechlin is a delight. She is a far cry from the typical Bollywood beauties, but her earthy and real attitude combined with natural charm makes her truly endearing even if her character is not. And of course, who can forget about Bagwati... wah! Kya acting hai! Plus I´m sure it was Bagwati who made the greatest impact of the whole cast, setting a trend by herself.

The best debutant of 2011.

The movie does not really have a Bollywood or even Indian feel to it, in spite of several songs (and one perfectly performed by the actors themselves) and Farhan´s own beautiful and soulful poetry included. I don´t really think it is a pity, because it works as it is, but should anyone ask, this is definitely not what possible newcomers should expect from Bollywood. We are given some interesting points to think about as well as some excellent one liners and memorable quotes. It all flows beautifully, makes you feel beautifully and maybe you might even learn something about yourself. It gives laughs and gives tears. Just like life that you don´t live twice.

Quickies I.

Just quick takes on several different films.....

FASHION

Directed by: Madhur Bhandarkar
Starring: Priyanka Chopra, Kangana Ranaut, Arbaaz Khan
Released: 2008

This did not look like a Bollywood movie at all..... and it works great, though I must admit it´s not a film I would like to watch again, definitely not the whole thing at one time. Priyanka was brilliant, especially in the second part, looked absolutely fabulous, but I must admit I was even more smitten by Kangana´s performance as Shonali. This was the film that made me love her - and then the love was taken away by Tanu weds Manu and Game.... but here the magic still prevails. As far as her performance goes it was THE EXPERIENCE for me. The movie was really a girl´s show from the beggining to end, though Arbaaz deserves a mention. Sometimes it happens to me, that the three hours, which a is a regular time for Bollywood movies, are just tooooooo damn long. I did not have this feeling during this movie.

It was nice to see Konkona and Ranvir, whom both I love, but let´s face it: that scene was simply good for nothing, because it was not related to the story in any way, hence it didn´t really work even as a special appearance. Music was nice, but nothing much to talk about. No songs. In this particular case thank God for that.

Brilliant movie. Now I need to go and watch Hum Aapke Hain Koun to get me out of depression. Joote Do Paise Lo.....!!!!!!
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WAKE UP SID

Directed by Ayan Mukerji
Starring: Ranbir Kapoor, Konkona Sen Sharma, Anupam Kher
Released: 2009

I had no idea what the plot is, all I knew it has Koko and Ranbir. And they were both just great in this nice, slow and charming movie!!! I thoroughly enjoyed the beggining, because Sid had the same illness as me - procrastination!!!! Pity his friends kinda disappeared after first 30 minutes, but in the end they were really not too important for the story. I really liked the plot - no dramatic over the top situations, just simple tale of a man finally growing up...... and for once the growth of love was understandable, enjoyable and BELIEVABLE!!!

As I already said, Ranbir was great. I love the guy! And Koko is brilliant. I would so love to see her in more movies. She does not have a nice profile, but otherwise she is IMO much more gorgeous then Katrina or Sonam. And her talent is unquestionable.

Very enjoyable movie, that slows down a bit in the second half. The word I would describe it would be "refreshing".
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TAAL

Directed by: Subhash Ghai
Starring: Aishwariya Rai, Akshaye Khanna, Anil Kapoor
Released: 1999

Movie that is anything but exciting. Full of half-baked characters, out of whom only Anil had something that would interest you. But there are definitely some plus poits. One was Aishwarya - I don´t know whatever has happened to her nowdays, but she used to be so adorable! I mean - she was so very natural in this film, it was sheer pleasure to watch her. I´m also a fan of her simple look without much make-up and jewellery, so this worked as well. She danced BEAUTIFULLY. Another plus point was Anil - his acting was a highlight. And then there is BEAUTIFUL title song that is absolutely magical. I loved the picturization as well. In fact the whole soundtrack of Taal can be definitely labeled as one of the best Rahman´s albums. Pity not all the voices used suited Aishwariya...

I was SHOCKED to see Amrish Puri was not a bad guy!!! That is something that just isn´t right...

And I will never understand why Bollywood heroines so often love the most impossible jerks. Akshaye´s character was purely annoying to me (and mind you, I adore Akshaye!). He was just too sure of himself!!! And then he gave away the finale halfway through the film!!! "You will send her to me, she will come out of her own decision...." blah blah blah..... And then to ensure his success in the end he decides to use a CUTE DOG as a weapon!!!! Now that is EMOTIONAL BLACKMAILING!!!!

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MOHRA

Directed by: Rajiv Rai
Starring: Akshay Kumar, Raveena Tandon, Naseeruddin Shah, Suniel Shetty
Released: 1994

The greatest strengh of this movie is the plot no doubt. And it is also (together with the somehow psychotic Naseeruddin Shah) the only saving grace. The first hour was somehow boring and full of WTF (the jail was WTF for sure. No police anywhere in sight, prisoners roaming wherever they wanted to....). I never thought much about Akshay as an actor (thought he looked YUMMY here, never liked him anywhere else), and Raveena too was average. The second part of the film is definitely thrilling and has some good moments, but somehow I have overgrown the totally totally evil evil guys and totally totally good good police officers. Once again the twists in the story were great and unexpected. What I hated was the stolen melody - this time from Jesus Christ Superstar.
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BAABUL

Directed by: Ravi Chopra
Starring: Rani Mukherjee, Amitabh Bachchan, Salman Khan, John Abraham, Hema Malini
Released: 2006

The first 90 minutes were like watching Hum Aapke Hain Koun 2 (except Salman did not look cute, more like silly this time) - all was there from warm family relationships, celebratory songs, wedding, pregnancy......... but the magic of HAHK was not present at all. The second part was nothing but boring and the ending was a bit too quick a bit naive - and also ended up on HAHK note. I really liked Rani though, she was awesome and very believable and also Amitabh gave a good performance. The scenes between him and Rani are the highlits and it is interesting to note that Rani had more chemistry with him then with Salman or John. Those two are easily overshadowed by Rani and Big B. Om Puri and Hema Malini whose characters were IMO quite essential to the story, were unnecceserilly and unforgivably sidelined.

Only worth watching for Rani and her interaction with Amitabh.

7 Khoon Maaf

Directed by: Vishal Bhardwaj

Starring: Priyanka Chopra, Neil Nitin Mukesh, John Abraham, Irrfan Khan, Aleksandr Dyachenko, Annu Kapoor, Naseeruddin Shah, Vivaan Shah

Released: 2011

I had NO expectation whatsoever, because even though I like Priyanka, I wouldn´t call myself a fan, and even though I liked the little bits of the story I´ve heard, I wasn´t sure if it would be good enough - and to be frank I did not like the trailer at all. If anything, I found the movie interesting. From psychological point of view it is an excellent piece of work. Presented in flashbacks, a story of Susanna slowly unfolds in front of us. A young woman, who never loved anyone more then her father (as her mother died too early), just lost her support in life. And with her father´s death she is beginning to look for that one man, who will give her the same amount of love, caring and security. But it is obviously way too much to ask for and Susanna, with every new step she takes on her journey looses her original naivity, innocence and illusions.

Beautiful, young and innocent

This is what marriage does to you!

From everything – the trailers, promo pictures and even the title itself you can be pretty sure what is the film about. Susanna, in her search for love, kills all her husbands, in one way or another. But still, even though you know that she´ll kill them all, you are always eager to know why? They are all very different guys. They have qualities others admire. But they also have some major flaws. And every time Susanna marries, you already wonder just what is wrong with the new guy because there just HAS TO be something....). Equally interesting it is to watch her getting rid of them one by one. Priyanka may be the only performer after Shahrukh Khan that you will feel sorry for even though she´s a mass killer. The scenes were not exactly graphic, but just knowing what is going on in the frame could make you sick (I sure did feel sick several times).

I was somehow confused at first since it is supposed to be 7 murders, but I could only count 6 of them. There are two options, which in my opinion might explain the seventh murder. One theory is that Susanna symbolically killed herself with entering into the order in the end, or that she just as symbolically killed the Christ with her previous sins. If you are familiar with Christianity, I´m sure you´ll understand what I mean. The second theory is much more simple: Susanna felt responsible for the death of her maid and counted that one as one more murder. Or am I really missing something and all this thinking is wrong?

Husband no.1 : Violent, possesive, jealous.

Husband no. 2: Drug addict. (something tells me this is what John wears at home)

Husband no. 3: Poetic and sadistic.

Husband no. 4: Spy and already married.

Husband no.5: Way too horny.

Husband no. 6 : Trying to kill you. Duh.

The story unfolds very naturally, and all the flashbacks are very seamlessly thrown in. As I have mentioned the plot is predictable, but there is still no shortage of surprises, and the ending is brilliant. Only the scene with Susanna having a "vision" was a bit awkward, I would have preferred for her to actually be alone in the room, maybe with some light effects or something...... This was way too much in-your-face and it somehow didn´t have any magic or excitement to it. Still there are not many negatives I can think of right now. What made it were especially the performances.

It is more then safe to claim the film wouldn´t be half as good if it wasn´t for Priyanka. This is her film through and through. In fact she made it so much hers I cannot really picture any other actress in the role. She was perfect. She managed to portray a very complex and atypical character, who – in addition – leads you through her whole life. From naive and innocent Suzie she effortlessly becomes Sultana or Anna, always willing to sacrifice her identity in the name of love. She gets tougher and tougher with each wrong step she takes, and it costs her dearly. Energy and vivaciousness are vaining, until she becomes a wreck. And from there she again manages to rise – and do the most sensible decision of her life. She is not somebody you would hate, and puts you into a strange position with her ability to make you sympathize with her despite all those things you know are just wrong. But in the end of the day you cannot help but feel her insecurity, which results into trusting easily and not minding changing the religion. With Susanna, who is a bit Christian, bit Hindu, bit Muslim and bit who knows what else, you get a clear message: God is Love, no matter how you call Him. I was also glad that even though Priyanka was presented beautifully and sexy, there wasn´t anything vulgar about her portrayal.

Love doesn´t care....

...for nationality...

...or religion.

Though they all had a limited screen space, the husbands manage to hold their own. The weakest is John Abraham, but that doesn´t come exactly as a surprise. Mr. Shah was my favourite, but I might be a little biased in his favour (cause I simply love him!). Irrfan Khan too does a brilliant job, and Russian actor Aleksander Dyachenko too makes a strong impact. The supporting cast too does a good job. I must admit that Susanna´s three faithful servants could scare the heck out of the Addams family any day. The newcomer Vivaan Shah looks very promising and it was very pleasant to see Konkona Sen Sharma in her cameo, even if for several minutes.

Technically the film isn´t the best. Music doesn´t leave any mark with the sole exception of „Darling“, which is a note by note rip off of a popular Russian folk song Kalinka (at least the makers did not try to act as if it was theirs, as it is pretty common in Bollywood).

7 Khoon Maaf doesn´t exactly deliver when it comes to emotions and connecting with the audience, there is no message either. For me it was a fascinating psychological trip into a soul of a woman desperately searching for love. It is a dark film, not fit for you if you get easily depressed.